Ever since I could remember, I always struggled with confidence. I was incredibly shy as a child and cried whenever I had to do any sort of public speaking (that means saying hello to another human being). My goal everyday was to go unnoticed or to ‘fit in.’ I was so scared to stand out. I’ve recently reflected on these experiences and realized I’ve never really ‘fit in’ anywhere. I was always “too this” or “too that” to everyone and in every space. Not too long ago, I came to the conclusion that I will never fit in.
When I started pole, I was not only introduced to an amazing art form but also an incredible community. I feel that everyone in pole encourages you to express your individuality, take risks, do things that you would have never dreamed of doing – like wearing 8 inch heels and doing body rolls! I feel that whenever an ounce of doubt entered my mind, like do I look stupid doing this? Or, is this too sexy? I always got positive messages from other polers like just do it! Or, what do you mean too sexy?! The people at Inversion is what makes it such a great place – to grow, learn, explore, take risks, and sometimes heal.
In my experience, there are so many external forces that tell us what we can and cannot be – what is acceptable, proper, and expected. I feel that once I enter Inversion’s studio, all that noise and baggage is left at the door. You get to focus on yourself, your training, and your style. Inversion has helped me gain the confidence to reject cultural and societal norms and expectations and allow me to answer the question, what do I want for myself and for my life?
I’m still at the same conclusion that I will never fit in, but after joining Inversion, I now know I was never meant to and that’s totally okay! I am exploring my own path and creating the life that I have always wanted along with a community that has supported my process every step of the way. Inversion and pole has given me confidence not only on the pole and in the studio but also to be my own person.